Hi ladies and gents, today is a very different type of post for me. In fact I have never broached this subject before. The reason I am writing this post is because it is something that effects me daily and I think it can effect us all at different times in different ways.
After posting about my Detox, I found that not only did it really help me stick to it because I felt like if I didn't I would be letting you all down and I don't want to do that, I also got lots of messages saying how it inspired others to do the same and stick to theirs. So maybe if I write about this subject it will help in this area too!
You might be thinking ok what is she talking about, so I will get to it...
fear
fɪə/
noun
noun: fear; plural noun: fears
1.
an unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm.
"I cowered in fear as bullets whizzed past"
| synonyms: | terror, fright, fearfulness, horror, alarm, panic, agitation, trepidation, dread, consternation, dismay, distress; More |
The type of fear I am talking about is the one which holds you back from new opportunities and experiences, when you say no to attending a meet up because of the thought of so many new people you don't know, when you don't pick up the phone and make that call about a new job because well what if they say you're not what they are looking for?
For years I have had this fear living inside me never sure of what it was, I just knew that certain things scared me and made me feel vulnerable and unsafe. Often I would avoid these people or situations. Now I realise that this is a form of anxiety.
The reason I am writing this post is because I am sick and fed up of being contained by this fear, I have well and trully had enough!
The biggest part of it for me is worrying about what people will think, pre-empting what they will say and taking on those feelings inside myself. Even though half of the time I am actually wrong.
So with all this in mind I am christening this month of 2014 Feel the Fear and do it anyway February!!
My Plan of Action
1. Make every phone call I am 'thinking' about making
Throughout the day there are probably at least 5-10 calls I 'think' about making. Sadly that is as far as it has gone in the past, thinking. This in itself creates more fear, then anxiety because I haven't done what I was meant to. Then come the feelings of low self esteem. Oh golly what a visious circle!
I vow to my readers and myself that every time I 'think' about making a phone call I will act on it at that moment or put a specific time in my diary to do it. Once it is in the diary it HAS to be done, those are the rules people!
2. Ask for what I need
How often do you need help with something but instead of asking trudge on trying in vain to do it yourself, wouldn't it have been so much easier just to ask?
I vow to my readers and myself that when I need help with something or I need a number/email address of somebody I am trying to contact I will just ASK! (note to self: It really isn't that difficult)
3. Say/Write what I am thinking
Am I the only one that can over think that I am writing or going to say? "what if the other person thinks it is wrong or doesn't agree with me"? So what, I say to that...
I vow to my readers and myself that I will say and write what I am thinking. Starting with my new pinterest board called "F*** Fear in the Face"!!! We live in a world full of differences and opinions that is why we all have a mind of our own, otherwise we might as well be procreating robots!
4. Make fear a source of fascination.
I read that accepting your fear and becoming fascinated by it is a sure fire way to conquer it.
I vow to my readers and myself that I am going to find out everything I can about the source of my fear. Where does it come from? Why does it have so much power? Essentially I will become friends with it. Kind of like I did with my anxiety, I said "listen anxiety if you are going to be around for a while we might as well be friends"!
5. Celebrate my victories
I think it is really important to applaud yourself when you take a positive step. It gives you the determination to take another step, then another.
I vow to my readers and myself that I am going to become my own biggest cheerleader, applaud every step I take big or small. I will even treat myself to little prizes along the way! #loveyourselffirst
I would LOVE to hear your thoughts on this. Does anyone else feel like this? Does Fear hold you back at all? Do you suffer from anxiety?
Ashly xx
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